Even though you have some part to play in it, given the circumstances I would say this relationship clearly wasnt right for you. Hold your head high and keep up the good fight king!

I am hesitant to be too hardline here as it is only one side of the story, however from what you are saying I do not think you are in the wrong at all. If she only thinks of herself and how you should be doing more for her with all of the difficult circumstances you are going through that reads to me as very self centered, never mind the obviously alarming hubris of accepting no responsibility. Sorry you had to go through that, but it sounds like it might be for the best honestly.

Ovethinking never leads anywhere good, it sounds like you are building a lot of expectations for how you want things to go and how she should react, but that simply isn't how relationships work, from what you said I would say it is pretty clear she is interested in you, no one comes back for 3 dates and a makeout session with someone they aren't interested in. The hard part is already over, just let the relationship take its natural course and enjoy it for it is. With regards to next steps if you've been going out for dates, maybe something like cooking her dinner and a movie at your place? Not sure it matters to much in that regard, but keep it up and don't be afraid to try to initiate things.