That isnt a good take. It can happen espacially for inexperienced people. They made out for 3 hours, its not like they kissed a couple times and 2 minutes later he starte sucking her skin till a hickey appeared. I never tried to have one appear on purpose but it did happen. It just does.

I dont even know what to say. Just wow.

From ALL the possible cartoon characters you (a 26 year old dude with an (ex)Girlfriend) decided to take Eric Cartman as a rolemodel and tried to act like him.

Not just is he a Character that isnt meant to be seen as an example of how to act with other people, hes pretty much the opposite, but also did you really think its a great idea to insult your girlfriend while also insulting her religion? You didnt just call her a Jew you also called her stupid. Also did you reduce her whole heritage to very stereotypical pictures.

It also seems like you just started with this shit because you thought you could have a "fun dynamic" like the characters in your favorite series (which by the way hate each other, dosnt sound like a great dynamic to have with your girlfriend) . Thats just pretty fucking stupid.

Please think about doing stuff like this, and the characters you want to have as a rolemodel. I like South Park too and I like Cartman. But I wouldnt want to be like him, and if you want people to like you, you shouldnt either.

Try to apologize to your Girlfriend, dont do this shit again and then I hope that you two can work it out.

Pretty sure you really arent in danger of anything legally. If anyone asks you about it, just tell them that some crazy chick bummed a ride of you and you took her to the gas station, aint your business what shes doing inside there. And I dont think this small theft is anything someone will say was coordinated from inside the car. So as long as you dont lie when asked, like saying you werent there, it shoulld be fine. Dont do favours for her again though.

Did He put it in your butt?