It was the most difficult conversation of our entire marriage. finally, after 10 years of being married I found courage to ask her more or less straight. And some information was rather hurtful to me. It did not change how much I love her but I wish we had had this conversation before we got married.

From my own experience of 26 year marriage, yes, you should absolutely dsicuss it and both of you shouold be absolutely transparent. Then both of you need either accept each other or end it and if you do accept it then never bring it up again.

If you do not discuss it it will haunt you forever like it did in my marriage until many many years we did discuss it and it was more painful had it been before we got married.

Nothing, absolutely nothing in a happy healthy marriage should be a taboo. Complete openess is a prerequisite t oa happy long marriage.